ONE

Bea's birthday is this weekend.

I have been so busy, I haven't even had time to process it.

We had a big party lat weekend, with my parents and sister in town, and my ILs here and staying through this week.

Sunday we are going to CA to introduce Beanie to her great-grandmother.

I want to write Beanie a love letter, and tell her all the things that she does now and that she is to me. And I will bake her a cake.  And she has some presents to open. And I plan to kiss her plump cheeks a thousand times*. And the camera will come out.

But somehow, tonite, given a few seconds to think about it, it feels kinda anticlimatic.

Should I be gnashing my teeth because Serenity is not here? Should I be bouncing off the walls because I've managed to keep Beanie alive?

Or, does a day on a calendar not really matter when every day is important?


*normal days it's probably 999 times.