We survived March

Today is the first day that it's just been Bea and me since the beginning of March.

In two weeks, Bea took six flights. We went to CA to meet her great-grandmother, who doesn't speak English. We stayed at a hotel, but saw her for the better part of two days.

Then we accompanied Triple S on two second interviews. We will be moving in August.  I think the negotiations will be wrapped up this week, so it will be settled as to where we are moving (warm place, warm place...)

At the one interview, we were 'wined and dined' two nights in a row at 7 pm. Bea goes to bed at 6:30.... But she managed.

Numerous people commented on how 'good' she was on the plane and out at the restaurants. It makes me cringe. It's not like anyone did anything to 'make her good' and 'make her behave'. We just got lucky. And meltdowns were averted by nursing or distracting or hugging or just letting her fuss some time.

But I cringe at this labeling. Would she be 'bad' if she were crying. Yes, it is unpleasant, and I wouldn't want her to be crying for an entire 4 hour flight. Sure, it would be a bit nerve-wracking for me, esp with the added pressure of annoying people, but mostly because I wouldn't want her to be suffering for that time. If she is crying, there is SOMETHING wrong.

I have started reading some parenting blogs, none that I want to recommend to others yet, because some posts are god and some are off. Most of the blogs are too wordy (coming from me, the queen of brevity), but really, if your target audience is parents of young children...

But I am really into not labeling and not over praising. I have pretty much stopped using good job, because I was saying it all the time! Now I just smile at Bea, and I can see that she is happy when she accomplishes something. Like today, she spent a total of at least two hours putting balls into a tissue box and taking the back out.  And checking that there were in the box. And shaking the rattly balls. Do I really need to encourage her and tell her 'good job' everytime she takes the ball out? Nope.

And when she cooperates in getting dressed, I thank her, instead of praising her. I think thank you recognizes her effort and expresses the emotion I feel, rather than putting the emphasis on her 'performance'. I don't know, is it a subtle difference?

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With this move coming up (and the craziness that will be the next four months) I am beginning to wonder what I will do when Bea goes to school. I don't know that I will want to do my freelance editing full time. I am thinking about a couple retail options, but that will depend on the market we move into. I thought about having a farm, but I think the commute will be too long for Triple S. But we will rent for a year so that we can choose a good house and neighborhood.

That's the update from our recently very busy life now turned to hopefully kinda boring.